You've tried the rest. Now try the worst.
Totally unlicensed advice for anxiety, depression, complex trauma, ADHD and restless leg syndrome
Let's Talk About You
Why you're here
First of all, don't these people in the stock photo appear a little too good-looking to be in therapy? It's not just us, right?
Anyway, back to you.
Chances are, you've tried traditional routes of therapy to treat your mental maladies. These treatments have probably included:
- Talk Therapy
- SSRI's
- Electroshock Therapy
- Strap-you-down-and-beat-the-shit-out-of-you-with-dildos Therapy
- Benzos
- CBT
- Mushrooms that made you think you were Jesus Christ
- Weaker mushrooms that made you think you were Carol from Accounting
...and a host of other things that may have left you no better for the wear, and possibly worse.
But there's hope for you yet!
Read on...
About Unqualified Therapy
Why is this woman so handsy with her patients? Someone call the state board.
Anyway, about us.
We want to help you through your dark night of the soul.
With love, compassion, recognition and stale bagels.
Would we like them to be fresh? Sure, who wouldn't? But we only get up to Queens every one in a while so it is what it is.
Our practice was founded in 1958 by Dr. Augustus...
Ok, that's bullshit. This was cooked up on a whim a few months ago and we got a domain name and website and here we are with literally no plan as to what to do with this.
But we really can help you. That's the good news.
Because you don't actually need help. Your soul chose this. So our incompetence fits in with your divine plan rather beautifully. You're welcome.